Quote ideas

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Revision as of 17:36, 30 October 2017 by 107.72.162.122 (talk) (→‎Quotes: add one!)
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This page includes lines, whether descriptive or quotational, that would go well in a story.

Quotes

  • "Blast off, we have blast off!"
  • "Sure thing, sugar!"
  • "OK, cowboy!"
  • "My opinion is your opinion."
  • "My onion is your onion."
  • "Things are an illusion. Only the truth is real."
    • Or the same, but with "math" instead of "truth".
  • "...transcendental..." "Oh, you're into spiritual stuff?" "No, I mean, transcending spirituality and all that human stuff."
  • (At a serious occasion) "Bro, how do you spell Sriracha?"
  • "Is that a real, live moustache?"
  • (Angry, serious man) "If you get cancer, that means you didn't try hard enough!"
  • (Coach to cancer patient or double leg amputee) "All right, walk it off."
  • "Yes, sometimes I say to mosquitoes, 'How dare you bite me, one of the greatest men alive?!'"
  • "...a 5% increase in blow job creation this quarter..."
  • "Take another sit in the great bathtub of life."
  • "It's all a miracle, even the parts that suck!"
  • "Happy as a man in cunt!"
  • "For man, pussy is both the beginning and the end."
  • "Yesterday's failure is today's fuel."
  • "What's good for you is doing what's important."
  • "When normal is getting drunk and hating, I sure fucking hope I'm eccentric."
  • "After gay, then gay and lesbian, LGB, LGBT, LGBTQ, etc, I think we should just skip to ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ!"
  • "I'm pansexual. I'm attracted to pans."
  • "All I want for Christmas is an exoskeleton."
  • "You kneed him in the balls or you need him in the balls or you knead him in the balls?"

Lines

  • In the future, Americans will live in houses so big that you can drive a car through them, and only get out for sex, so once a month.
  • Rice is like the ultimate test of human maturity.
    • (Because it takes patience and wisdom to prepare it properly...)
    • (And it tastes great!)
  • You can't cram for the exam at the school of life.
  • In life, you can't have it all, but you can enjoy what you have.