Difference between revisions of "What a Joke?!"
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==One-liners== | ==One-liners== | ||
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| + | What's the wittiest you can say in just one line? | ||
* In a new cost-cutting measure, the US government is changing the American flag to purple and white. | * In a new cost-cutting measure, the US government is changing the American flag to purple and white. | ||
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==Q&A== | ==Q&A== | ||
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| + | Want to know more? You know you do! | ||
* Q. What do you call a library in Mexico? A. Fiesta! | * Q. What do you call a library in Mexico? A. Fiesta! | ||
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==Back-and-Forth== | ==Back-and-Forth== | ||
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| + | [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Dozens The dozens]. How many ya got? | ||
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* "It feels really good." "Like farting in the bath?" "No, like peeing in the bath." | * "It feels really good." "Like farting in the bath?" "No, like peeing in the bath." | ||
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| + | ==Acts & Scenes== | ||
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| + | Dramedy! | ||
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| + | ===A bite to eat=== | ||
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| + | In a southern diner, a NORTHERN GUEST, looking at menu, speaks with a WAITRESS: | ||
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| + | NORTHERN GUEST, LOOKING AT MENU | ||
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| + | Excuse me, I don't see your kale salad with quinoa. | ||
| + | |||
| + | WAITRESS | ||
| + | |||
| + | Huh? | ||
| + | |||
| + | GUEST | ||
| + | |||
| + | And are your waffles non-GMO, vegan, gluten-free, and organic? | ||
| + | |||
| + | WAITRESS | ||
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| + | Sorry, ma'am, we don't have no G.I. Joe figures here. | ||
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| + | GUEST | ||
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| + | I think I'll just have your... hm... chicken-apple-pecan salad, hold the chicken and pecans. | ||
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| + | WAITRESS | ||
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| + | Y'all just want a plate of apples? | ||
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| + | GUEST | ||
| + | |||
| + | And bring me a cup of cranberry rooibos. | ||
{{What a Joke}} | {{What a Joke}} | ||
[[Category:Jokes]] | [[Category:Jokes]] | ||
Revision as of 09:43, 27 June 2015
This'll blow air through your ears...
One-liners
What's the wittiest you can say in just one line?
- In a new cost-cutting measure, the US government is changing the American flag to purple and white.
- "That editor needs a semicolonoscopy."
- "In the US, saying hi to a girl is sexual harassment, and the age of consent is thirty five."
- "It sure seems like a lot of sheriffs are Jewish."
- "...the hot new dance track, 'I Left my Right Leg (Back in Iraq)'..."
- "Ever take the kind of shit that gives you PTSD?"
- "Ever take the kind of crap that takes a C-section?"
- "I love dogs, with a little Hoisin."
- "Of course mustard's not as good on hot dogs! The military doesn't kill people with ketchup gas, does it?"
- "White people aren't hampered by emotions."
- "Build on your successes and cover up your failures."
Q&A
Want to know more? You know you do!
- Q. What do you call a library in Mexico? A. Fiesta!
- Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. Just cuz.
- Q. How many homebuilders does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A. Just one.
- ...
- Q. What do you call a library in African America? A. The Martin Luther King, Jr. branch.
Back-and-Forth
The dozens. How many ya got?
- "It feels really good." "Like farting in the bath?" "No, like peeing in the bath."
Acts & Scenes
Dramedy!
A bite to eat
In a southern diner, a NORTHERN GUEST, looking at menu, speaks with a WAITRESS:
NORTHERN GUEST, LOOKING AT MENU
Excuse me, I don't see your kale salad with quinoa.
WAITRESS
Huh?
GUEST
And are your waffles non-GMO, vegan, gluten-free, and organic?
WAITRESS
Sorry, ma'am, we don't have no G.I. Joe figures here.
GUEST
I think I'll just have your... hm... chicken-apple-pecan salad, hold the chicken and pecans.
WAITRESS
Y'all just want a plate of apples?
GUEST
And bring me a cup of cranberry rooibos.
What a Joke?! is a book of jokes. Get it?
